On Finding a Church Part 1.

Despite the fact that Mr. Manatee had very clear intentions of being married in a church, he didn't really have any specifications of which church. Spoiler alert: This was the first time his mother and I had ever actually butt heads over anything. She wanted us to get hitched in a gorgeous church in his hometown (Southlake) that they attended on occasion, and I had my eye on a church about two blocks down from our reception location. Both of these churches were Methodist, but that's pretty much where the comparison stops. Always eager to keep the peace between Manatee-In-Law and I, I usually would have just agreed to use White Chapel. However.

SL White Chapel

There were several roadblocks between us and wedded bliss at White Chapel.
1. The DFW Connector 

The connector is actually the job site that my darling fiance receives his paychecks from. It is also the biggest pain in my road-rage-prone butt. Ideally, this 3 billion dollar fix cleans up traffic throughout the Metroplex and eases the cluster-truck congestion in Grapevine. In reality, it just fatally confuses any GPS that attempts to navigate it and any normal driver that comes across it.This job has been going on for years, has little chance of being finished by June 1st, and skyrockets my blood pressure every time I'm behind the wheel. It is also right smack in the main roadway between White Chapel and the Sanford House, and it's the last thing I want to involve our out of town guests in. No. Bueno.

2.  It's HUGE. Or tiny. 

 
We had a bit of a goldilocks problem with this venue. The Sanctuary holds...wait for it...2500 people! With a guest list of around 100-120, we were going to hear crickets. The wedding consultant half-heartedly suggested we could turn off the lights in the side wings. She did tell us about a small, historic little chapel that was part of the main building, and it was so adorable! The downside...it only held 65 people, and we were restricted to 3 BM and GM. At that point, we each already had 4, and we couldn't imagine asking anyone to step down. The walk down the aisle was, as you can imagine, about 10 steps, and that didn't much fit into our vision either. It sure was cute though!

White Chapel

3. It was expensive.
When I requested the information be sent over about pricing, my eyeballs just about popped out of my head. 'Mr. Man' and I started out on this search naive to the cost of getting married in a church. We ignorantly assumed that a holy house would be so thrilled for us to tie the knot before the eyes of the Lord they would just let us slip in with a hundred people on a Saturday. Not so! The fees to use the church were as follows:

	Non-Members	Members
Sanctuary	$2,400	$1,850
Chapel	$1,500	$1,000

Holy Crap! Mr. Manatee's family, thankfully, were members, which softened the blow... But not by much! In their defense, this included a pianist and the use of the minister. However. Considering that we had (just in case) allotted a pitiful $600 in our fledgling budget for the use of a church, even the tiny chapel was way out of our budget. The Manatees were already financially helping us and my family out with the wedding more than traditionally called for, so we weren't about to strain our budget any further.

Thankfully Manatee-In-Law saw that I really had given it a chance, but the cons to this option couldn't be ignored. We agreed to put White Chapel behind us.

Did you have a established church at the time of your engagement, or did you consider a few before booking a ceremony space?

If It's Not Moving, Monogram It

I'm relatively new to monogramming. I never cut my teeth on a copy of Southern Living, and as a Canadian, I'm distinctly....un-southern. But just because I wasn't raised in Texas, doesn't mean I dont die over these Southern details. So when this puppy popped up on my Pinterest, I knew I had to have it.

Frill Seekers Gifts

 I kid you not, not five minutes after I saw that Pin I was googling all kinds of monogram embossers. Some were expensive ($60) some were suspiciously cheap ($15? No way.) But I ended up going respectably mid-range at $25. I found this one on Amazon, and the fact that the example was my own initials seemed like a good sign to me. The only difficult part was figuring out if the husband's first initial was to come first or the bride's. After a quick web search, my results were inconclusive. Some said the husband's, some said the wive's, so I took matters into my own hands. I thought LNC had a better ring to it than CNL, which sounded like a late night talk show! Clayton didn't have an opinion about it either way, so I bought it! Less than four days later, the package was in our mailbox!

Just to be clear, I'm just as superstitious as the next bride, and so wont be using this stamp on anything pre-ceremony related! I'm hoping this monogram will class up some cocktail napkins and other details for our reception.

It seemed alarmingly small at first, but that was because they'd tucked the plate inside the machine for ease of storage. Of course I couldn't figure the damn thing out, but engineer fiance' came to the rescue and I was in business. I was disappointed that I didn't have any napkins at hand, but I did have a blank envelope that stood in just fine! 

 At first I stuck with stamping appropriate things, like different thicknesses of paper, but before long....I was monogramming pages of Clay's textbook, the wrapper to the crackers we were eating, anything that would stand still and could be pressed into holding our future initials. I couldn't wait to get my hands on some napkins.

Soon it was time for bed. Clay made a joking comment that he wouldn't be surprised if I'd monogrammed the sheets before he got in there. I was happy to oblige! (Although with little success)

Have you ever gotten extra excited about wedding related mail? Maybe gone a little overboard "testing it out?"

I'll Wear White Part 2

After my first few unsuccessful experiences with dresses, I was starting to get a little discouraged, but a little closer to knowing what I wanted.
I took a trip to Lewisville Bridal with MOH Ashley, and got a little closer to finding what I wanted. I tried on probably 6-7 dresses. They were very helpful, but they didn't allow pictures. We got some sneaky shots while the attendant was off looking for belts. It came down to these two.

This is La Sposa Detalle. It was REALLY close to what I wanted, and the tulle was to die for. I didn't think the sweetheart was deep enough, and it wasn't very flattering in the midsection. I could have had the neckline altered, but that would have been another expense. I've lost about ten pounds since this picture, so it might fit better now, but it still wasnt exactly what I wanted.

I'm really glad now that I look at these pictures that I didnt choose this one. (I can't remember the designer) I was still trying to make the folds work. You can't tell, but the neckline had really cool feather details I was really tempted by. My waist was a little more cinched in this, but the folds were still too toilet paper for me. Dang you, mother, for planting that idea in my head!

A few weeks after this visit, I talked to my grandma about what I should look for. She really encouraged me to get something with lace. When else can you wear full lace than on your wedding day? I had to admit she was right! I added it to my list of 'wants' for my dress.

Image via Google Images

On a last minute whim, my mom and I decided to go dress shopping one Saturday. Lulu's Bridal in Dallas didn't take appointments, but we decided to chance it. When we got there, there was a line out the door. While we were waiting, we decided to take a look at the racks... there really wasn't anything I wanted to try on. We were disappointed, but we were determined not to go home without trying on anything! I decided to try and sweet-talk my way into an appointment at Mockingbird Bridal, and they said if I could get there in the next fifteen minutes, I could slide in. Done and done!
I tried on some really pretty dresses, but I didn't find anything that really stood out. My mom liked the more old fashioned fabrics, but at this point, all I wanted was tulle. When we were about to leave, I spotted a dress hanging up that another bride had discarded, and I had to try it on. It looked a lot like the Detalle, but better somehow. My consultant slid it over my head, and there she was!
Enzoani Erin, and it was perfect. Well, besides that weird bow on the hip that I had removed. My waist looked tiny, the sweetheart was deep, the lace was perfect, and I was drowning in tulle. The only downside was the price tag....On sale, $1800. My mom, who so far hadn't really been impressed by anything, declared that this was the one and I needed to go ahead and do this regardless. I couldn't agree more, and I ran two blocks down the street in the rain to get a cashiers check to pay the 75% deposit. I beamed all the way home, and despite the zillions of dresses I've seen in magazines and online, I've never regretted my decision!
Just like finding the right man, you see hundreds or thousands, you'll try on a few, and you might even really, really like some of them... but when you find the one... you just know! And maybe you even find yourself completely emptying your bank account, running through the rain to make it happen.

     ^ I probably shouldn't make this face at parties.


When you found the perfect dress, did you just know? Was it a long journey to find 'her'?

I'll Wear White Part. 1

When I first started my dress search, I had these beauties in mind.

Designer: Vera Wang, featured on Us Weekly

Dress by Vera Wang, Img via Vera Wang Real Weddings

Carol Hannah Spring 2013

 It was immediately obvious that I loved floaty folds of tulle or silk. What I quickly realized was that yards and yards of tulle and designs like these....well, they're expensive. We're talking 5-10k. Or more! My original budget for a dress was around $1200. I wasn't yet aware of the realm of pre-owned dresses, so I did what I could with my budget. The only other pre-requisite I had for my dress was that it have a sweetheart neckline.

I started my search because of a dress I found at Davids Bridal that was similar to the Vera Wang folds dress. It belonged to the Vera Wang - White collection, but as soon as I stepped into it I could tell it wasn't matching the vision I had of the original Vera.

Vera Wang "White" by Davids Bridal

Vera Wang "White" By Davids Bridal

My mother immediately compared the folds to "folds of toilet paper" or worse "like lady parts." and after she made that comparison, I couldn't see it any other way. The v-neck option was pretty, but my bridesmaids finally admitted that it made me look...well.... older than I am. I gave up on the folds and decided to focus on the floaty sweetheart options.

The next dresses I tried on were at a bridal salon called Classy Concepts in Mansfield. This is where I first started to consider lace. I peeked over at the bride one stand over and was experiencing some serious dress envy of her full lace dress. I tried on several dresses, but only one really caught my interest. I tried it on, and it completely fulfilled my 'floaty' requirement. It also had this gorgeous flower embroidery, and a pretty barely pink empire waist. It didn't have a tag, and I plagued the Hive with this mystery dress picture until the designer was found. This is Casablanca 1951, and its previous owner had called off her wedding :(

I really did love this dress. The gemstone in the middle made me feel like a hippie version of princess Jasmine, and I'm experiencing a little dress regret as I post this. The only problem was that it was very slightly too short for me, something probably only I noticed. My mom offered to pay the 'hold price' of $50, and off we went with promises to bring my mother-in-law back to take a look at it before I pulled the trigger. However, the longer I was away from the dress, the less sure I was...so I kept looking.

I tried on some dresses at GroupUSA in Grapevine, but they were inattentive and unhelpful, and MOH Ashley had to help me in and out of the dresses. We didn't find anything that stood out, either, a lot of overpriced, old fashioned designs.

Overall, I probably tried on close to 30 dresses, if I had to guess, but in the end it came down to two. Tune in for part 2 ;)

The Meeting of the Maids

I've got my man, but what about my maids?!

Bridesmaids the movie

Originally, I was trying to hold off on picking my maids, something I should have tried harder at for reasons we'll talk about later.
Despite this, it was pretty obvious that MOH Ashley was immediately on the list. I've known her since at least 7th grade.  Almost immediately, I had 3 bridesmaids (4, for a short time.)

MOH Ashley

The thing is, Ashley wasn't always my MOH. My first instinct was to ask Bridesmaid Mallory. She was my first roommate in college, and we have extremely similar personalities. We used to sit around and eat entire bowls of guacamole (cue the freshman 15.) We are both nursing majors. In Spring of 2012, Mallory started nursing school, at which point she got incredibly busy, and we didn't get to see each other as much. In October when I first got engaged, she accepted the position of MOH, but it soon became obvious that she just wouldn't have time for the job. We talked about it, and she agreed to join me as just a bridesmaid. 

Bridesmaid Mallory

It was a no brainer to ask Clay's sister to be a bridesmaid. I have two brothers, no sisters, and I was so happy to inherit one! I love her to death, even though she recently graduated high school to go play Volleyball for Iowa State! Although I'm totally jealous that she's seriously athletic and I am passable at only a few sports, I can't wait for us to be sisters! Because she's so far away, it'll be hard for us to coordinate bridesmaid stuff, but it'll be worth it to have her involved.

Bridesmaid C

My next 'bridesmaid'....wasnt my choice. Lindsay kind of stepped into the role because we ran closely in the same social sphere. At the time, she had been dating GM Dustin for a year or so, and well....assumed the role. She started texting me about bridesmaids dresses, came with me to David's Bridal, and made all kinds of assumptions. At first I didn't mind, because we were friends! Well, what I would call "situational" friends...until a few months later when it came out that she'd been fooling around on BM Dustin. It was no fun to have to pick sides, but when they eventually broke it off, Clay was so angry at her that he demanded she not be part of our wedding. Clay and I both have very, very strong opinions on infidelity, and both the pain BM Dustin would have to deal with if she remained part of our wedding party and the awkwardness led us to ask her to step down. 

Shortlived BM Lindsay

Because of this bridesmaid drama, I decided to wait to ask any others. Who knew what could happen over the next year, and I didn't want to have to go through asking anyone else to step down. I havent had any more problems! *cross fingers*
Since then, I've asked Bridesmaid Miranda and Bridesmaid Carminia, both of whom are very important to me, and have been unbelievably lucky to have them with me throughout college!

BM Carminia

BM Miranda

Bridal Show Silliness!

The Mr. Picks His Men

Lets start off with a little history lesson about the origin of groomsmen. There are plenty of myths and legends associated with the bridal party, but the "bride-knight" myth is my favorite. This says that back in medieval times, the "bride-knights' helped their friend (the groom) capture his bride from wherever she happened to be. They also stood next to the groom at the wedding to make sure no one stole her back or in case the bride's angry family tried to stop the proceedings. The idea of Clay hoisting me over his shoulder and toting me across medieval highlands tickles me pink, and if that were true today, these guys would definitely be in on it.

Photo credit: http://www.matkey.com/blog/archive/2011/09

 Clayton and I have pretty much the same group of friends. These guys in particular mean a lot to us because not only have they been there for Clayton and I's entire relationship, a few of these guys have known Clayton since freshman year of highschool. Some of them are Pi Kappa Alpha brothers. We've assembled some of the best, silliest and downright boisterous men to stand next to Clayton on our wedding day. I couldn't be happier, because to be honest I love them all to death. Its hard to imagine our lives without these characters.

 Groomsman Tony - Tony and Clayton played football together at Southlake. He went to school with us for a year, but then got smart and transferred to Texas. He comes to visit so often that we often joke that him and Duy alternate weekends on our couch.













 
Groomsman Joe - Joe and Clay have known each other since high school, and bonded over a mutual love of Jimmy Buffett. He went to UCONN, so we didnt see him very often, but quality over quantity! 

 Groomsman Dustin - Dustin was a member of Clay's pledge class in Pike. He's a few years older than us, so the 'old' jokes never stop. He often functions as a mediator between Clayton and I, because of his 'age-related wisdom'. He still goes to school with us, so we're all thick as thieves. 

Groomsman Duy - Duy was also a member of Clay's pledge class, and frequents our couch as much as Tony does. He moved to Nacogdoches for nursing school, but we practically haven't noticed since he's with us so much.

 And just so you dont think all we do is shenanigans, here's a picture of us from Sophomore year...studying in the library.


Have you bonded over the years with your SO's best friends? Were you lucky enough to have them 'adopt you' like I was?

A Little Venue Indecision

Besides the fact that I'd already extensively researched The Sanford House in Arlington and pretty much liked everything about it, I started to get cold feet and researched some other venues.

1. Ashton Gardens

This venue is simply stunning. The venue operates with an all-inclusive package (food, drink, cake, location) but for a June, Saturday wedding it would run us close to 20k, and that was before photography, videography, DJ or anything else. Our original budget was supposed to be 16k, and it has creeped up to close to 18k. Although this venue is absolutely gorgeous and very tempting, I couldn't see how we would have made it happen for less than 25,000. As lovely as it was, we just had to pass on it.

2. Sheraton Arlington Ballroom

 I remember attending a school dance in this venue in high school, and thinking it was really amazing. The ballroom is literally suspended over a little lake with fountains. I emailed a little bit back and forth with the coordinator, but was surprised when I didn't have the same interest in this property as the others. I wasnt eyeballing my inbox hoping for speedy responses, and I just couldn't picture us there. There was no charge for using the space, but there were lofty food and beverage minimums, with catering starting at $40 a person. The food sounded delicious, in their defense. However, the open bar charge for four hours was about $45 a person. All in all, the food prices might have balanced out the lack of charge for the space and they did have more rooms for our guests, but we still weren't crazy about it.

3. Paradise Cove, Lake Grapevine

This venue we explored because of his family's attachment to Lake Grapevine. They dock a boat there, so we spend a great deal of time every summer on the lake! It wasn't the prettiest venue we'd seen, even with the lake views. The low, sloping ceiling also made it seem cramped. I'm 5'10 and the Mr. is 6'4, so ceilings are important to us! The lease-only package was actually pretty reasonably priced, but for the same price at the Sanford House we got linens, four hotel rooms, valet parking and setup and breakdown. They did allow outside catering, and the company they preferred had really yummy sounding food. I never did get around to asking for a catering estimate. Couples could also buy and bring their own alcohol to be served by Paradise Cove bartenders. I'd have to say that this was the most temping option. It was also close to the church Manatee-In-Law was pushing we have the ceremony at. More on that later.

 In the end, we decided to meet my parents for brunch at the Sanford House and let the food do the deciding for us. Since our biggest concern was that they required we use their caterer, the food had to be up to snuff. And it was! My stuffed chicken was to die for, Mr. Manatee's steak was cooked perfectly and as an added perk, my mom was excited to see Eggs Benedict on the menu! We also discussed our concerns with the coordinator a little more. She assured us that because of the shade, June 1st would be just perfect for an evening wedding, and that if it did rain on our big day, we wouldn't have to shell out an extra $1000 dollars on the spot for the tent. It was also just down the road from a church we were considering for the ceremony (More on that later!) We handed in our deposit soon after!